It was on the 30th of January, 2014 when I decided to snap out of my routine of putting Just One Yesterday by Fall Out Boy & Foxes on replay, and recreate the cyberspace journal I maintained during my youth. I remember hesitating for a moment, doubting whether or not I’d be able to fit blogging into my schedule of studying, watching chick flicks and fangirling, or be able to have something interesting to blog about on a regular basis. I was even asking questions I had to find the answers to as well (considering the fact that I had no friends who blogged or were even remotely interested in writing anything besides graded formal themes): what blogging platform should I use? Should I force myself to learn basic HTML codes to design my blog? *groans* And worst of all, how am I going to convince people to read what I put up?
But besides all these queries that remained unanswered for a long period of time, I muttered a loud “AH WHATEVER” to myself and launched what was formerly known as The World According to Angel. For what reason, I decided to find out why a year and two days after this event. Why did I decide to set up this blog?
It didn’t take long when an office mate of my mom’s had recommended that I set up a website on Blogger. You can still view it to this day over here. Obviously, back then, I had not even the faintest idea of what it meant to design my website, at]tract strangers on the Internet to read what I wrote and monitor my website traffic. So, I just picked a basic pink theme for my site and faithfully made short anecdotes about my exciting life and the people and events that made it the way it was. I was a hit with the other members of my immediate family and some close friends of my parents, but shortly after, my passion for it waned. I eventually forgot the password to my account and ditched the blogging life altogether. My interests shifted back to the capitals and inventions of the world, before it settled into One Direction and 5 Seconds of Summer.
Compared to other blogs in the Web, mine is still far from its peak. I am an amateur, as we all call it, and I have yet to master my craft and be able to have the power to convince the people of my generation to follow in my footsteps. And being an amateur comes with all sorts of difficulties.
I have doubted myself and my ability to write and construct a proper blog post more times than enough. I have had low moments wherein I have stared in front of a computer monitor with bloodshot eyes and tears of frustration streaming down my face, unable to write a decent opening sentence for what I had wanted to be an 800-word piece. And once I have pulled through and managed to do an okay job, I end up seeing something written by someone else. I see the fluid, straight to the point prose, compared to my collection of sloppy metaphors and feel the sharp decrease in my self-esteem.
I have also been mocked by a lot of people. I’ve been asked by classmates if I owned All My Own Stunts only to have them respond to my “Yes” with a resounding cackle. Tons of others have mock-requested me to take their photos and consider getting them as models for my next blog post. (If you guys happen to be reading this by some stroke of fate, let me tell you: it wasn’t nice.) I guess it’s not exactly easy for them to accept that some people could enjoy writing as a pastime, and not think of it as some sort of twisted punishment and/or form of child labor. (Quick update: The teasing has died down somehow, and now some members of my group of friends decide to support me by creeping on my blog every once in a while. Hello!)
I have also gotten confused numerous times about what kind of blog I wanted to run, and what content I posted would best represent who I am. Most bloggers making a name for themselves nowadays shoot to stardom with fashion blogs, peppered with photos of them strutting the latest additions to their wardrobe. (More on that later.) On the other hand, here I was, a girl not really rich enough to travel to a different place every month to blog about, and also not exactly that confident or boastful to want to pose in front of a camera wearing something different every weekend.
I have loved writing for so long that I know I’m not stopping in this lifetime, and I am driven beyond belief to become something like an “agent of change through the Internet” (may or may not have ripped off that last bit from my school’s Mission) that I just continue to roll with the punches and take them as I come. I know for a fact that I am not doing anything contrary to my beliefs as a Catholic as I write on this blog, and I am clearly avoiding any possible conflicts with people on the Internet (i.e. the douchebags who like to disagree with every positive post they come across), so why stop? My first year is only the beginning, a doorway to so many possible opportunities, projects and collaborations with wonderful people on the cyberspace, and I honestly cannot wait for what is up next!
As most people may know, I am a fan of 5 Seconds of Summer and in my pictures above, I decided to stan Calum Hood, aka the bassist and ½ of my sunshines. (The other half being Ashton Irwin, who recently got a girlfriend??!!! I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT). He usually pulls off a get-up composed of a white shirt with black sleeves, skinny jeans and black Vans, which I so happened to have in my closet.
Top—Topshop // Jeans—Forever 21 // Sneakers—Vans // Necklace—Robinsons Department Store // Watch—Marc Ecko
That is all for now, and I leave you with my favorite song as of now. All my loving.